The transition from youth to adulthood lasts from around twenty years of age to around thirty years of age. The transition can go almost unnoticed. In such a case, you can feel great satisfaction and joy at having succeeded, at having found a way of life that suits you and works smoothly. In addition, past life experiences will fall into place.
YOU DON’T HAVE TO KNOW EVERYTHING AT ONCE
Leaving one’s youth behind can also be accompanied by nostalgia, longing, sadness, and anxiety. The transition can feel difficult, even if there are no discernible reasons for it. You may feel powerless and disappointed. You may feel as if your ideals are being shattered and your dreams are not coming true.
Adulthood can feel uncomfortable and scary. Feelings of inadequacy and incompetence can also arise. There is a conflict between restlessness and a thirst for experiences, but also a desire to belong and establish yourself. The pain can run deep and even manifest itself as physical symptoms.
There can be big changes in relationships. Finding your own lifestyle can be a challenge. It is not always easy to identify your personal resources and how far they can take you. It is often difficult to find ways of influencing your inner world.
Transition requires us to give up the old, adapt, and learn new skills. It’s good to give yourself time and remember that not all things will resolve themselves at the same time.
BECOMING AN ADULT – A NEW PERSPECTIVE ON LIFE AND THE FUTURE
Dreams and ideals are strongly involved in our search for selfhood, individuality, and connection with other people and the world around us. Our values and ethical thinking are honed and given substance by living, experimenting, and questioning. A return to old, familiar values is possible, but this time through personal judgement and choice.
Concerns about the future, about oneself, and about issues larger than one’s own life are signs of the awakening of a new perspective. The carelessness of youth is left behind, and worries about the future arise. We are increasingly relying on ourselves. The world around us and its events become more meaningful. Work and family life anchor us in society and change our rhythm of life.
One of the signs of budding adulthood is an awareness of our limitations. For the first time in our lives, we may be confronted with the limits of our abilities, skills, and time. It also allows our self-awareness to develop and enables us to better direct our behaviour towards our potential.
MOVING AWAY from home is life-altering
Often, moving away from home and to another town is a prerequisite for starting our studies. This is a very significant change in a young person’s life and can be accompanied by strong, difficult emotional reactions. The most common reactions are anxiety, fatigue, mood swings, depression, sleep disturbances, and feelings of loneliness.
Moving away from home is a psychological process. It means having to give up the services provided by our childhood homes, such as laundry, food, cleaning, and financial security. Our parents’ expressions of love, care, and the security provided by the home are changing. We have to manage our daily routines and activities without our parents.
Living alone and being independent can bring with it a sense of freedom, but it can also bring anxiety and fear. Sleep disturbances or feeling vaguely unwell are not uncommon at the beginning of independent life.
Feelings of separation from the childhood home are also a sign that it is possible for us to grow and develop. When growing into adults, young people learn to know themselves and gain experience of being able to take care of their own affairs and studies.
MOVING IN WITH A PARTNER
Moving in with a partner may seem like a solution to the possible anxiety of living alone, but it may not be ideal.
Living together with someone else makes life easier when you can share responsibility for everyday things. While financial and other practical reasons may justify moving in together, in the background, there may also be fear and anxiety related to the independence phase. If this is the case, there is a risk that living together will create a co-dependent relationship and hinder the development of independence that comes with age. The relationship will not become an equal relationship capable of growth and development.